(no subject)

[fucking_gentleman]

[Continued from here]

Harry was not aware of the fight that happened when Eggsy went back to HQ.

He wasn't aware that Merlin had visited him twice since he woke up from his coma, because both times his brain had struggled with the damage and flood of memories and promptly failed to cope. He never managed to make an actual memory of Merlin's visits, because his memory centres had been too inflamed at that stage.

He may never know how gutted Merlin was to find that Harry was alive, but still just as gone as before and that he had agreed with the treating specialists to give Harry space to heal and recover before they did anything about trying to get his memory recovered.

Harry was not as well recovered as Harry thought he was, or managed to present.

But it was agreed that they wouldn't move him from where he was. The staff there were briefed on his situation, there was security in place and it wasn't worth the fight with both Eggsy AND Harry to get him moved.

Eggsy was told not to visit, to let Harry recover physically.

Harry, on the other hand, got out to the phone and managed to dial the number on the back of the medal and then gave what he assumed was the pass code of Oxfords, not Brogues.

Comments

[fucking_gentleman]

"Adapt, adopt, improve."

That didn't feel right.

"Learn, adapt, transform." That was more familiar. "Why would you do that? You have your own life, I presume, a family, a partner. I may never remember our previous meetings. I may never be close to the person that I was before. Brain damage can make people quite dramatically different and often unpleasant."

[prettyballsy]

He smiled then, nodding. "Learn, adapt, transform. Just what happened." And he had disappointed Harry in the last talk they ever had. He would never let that go. Even now.

"Mum and baby sister. They've got their own life. My life is different now. No partner. Got Roxy but she works more than I do so that doesn't change much," he said, smiling fondly as he talked about her.

"And so I get to know whoever Harry Dewhatchasaid is. You were there for me twice when I needed you, Harry. Why would I not be here for you now? Where I want to be. Also, for the record, so far you're not unpleasant at all. For one, you've not yelled at me once. Most do."

He was making jokes, trying to make him relax. "Do you want me not here?"

[fucking_gentleman]

"DeVere? Goodness, no, that's not me. Harry Hart at least feels familiar, my mouth says it naturally with a life time of experience."

He didn't feel like he was a person who yelled or shouted much. He had, once or twice, at his nurses when he was frustrated, but it had come with an apology and feeling genuinely contrite for his outbursts.

"I am glad you visited. My apologies, I don't seem to mean ungrateful for your company. I am simply trying to understand why a busy young man would choose to spend time with a brain damaged old man, outside of a sense of obligation. Which, if it is, I would sooner not have."

[prettyballsy]

"Good. Don't like it anyway," he said, smirking. "Least I could have just stuck with Harry." And he would have, because yeah, no. It was so... French, and romantic mooshy sounding. Because Hart wasn't.

"This busy young man has two things in his life, and only one since you died. The other is going to be looking for me soon and then there will be texts and more yelling and likely me tracking your ass down," he admitted, being bluntly honest. He suspected Harry would want that, one way or another.

"And no, that ain't it at all, and you're not old. You're Harry." And brain damaged. He couldn't argue that but he was seeing healing. Maybe one day he'd be out of a bed and living whatever life he wanted now. "I'm going to give you my mobile number before I go. Then you can call me and we won't risk Merlin intercepting, though he will. He gave me the damn thing."

[fucking_gentleman]

"From pre-Norman, 'Of Ver', came over to England during the Norman invasion." He really did know a lot of random things. Very random things.

"You'll need to write it on something, I have no phone of my own and they aren't permitted in intensive care." His hand been destroyed on V-Day in whatever had happened to him. "And my dear boy, you're what? Twenty four? Maybe twenty six? If the age in DeVere's passport is something like the truth, I'm twice your age, which makes me old in comparison."

[prettyballsy]

"What the fuck is the Ver you're of?" He put it out there, utterly Eggsy in just having to argue it.

"I can make that happen. Sally out at the station will get me a pen and paper, and bring you a phone," he added, waggling his brows and smirking. "I had her notifying me of your condition." He was trained by Harry to get what he wanted. Well, not quite but it was how he was using his training.

"Your passport lies. Subtract twenty years and I'm nearly forty," he said, entirely deadpan. "Buying that?"

[fucking_gentleman]

"DeVere. Means 'of Ver'. Interesting choice for an assumed name, was all. But also of French origin."

Harry had really been much the same. He used training and charm to get what he wanted, from marks, from other Kingsman agents, even Arthur in his own way. He did it now without really knowing it to get what he wanted from nurses.

"Leave the number with her and I'll recover it once you leave. Less evidence of a transfer taking place." And he'd be able to hide the number somewhere in the room without any possibility of Eggsy being used to spy on him.

"No, not in the slightest. I'm fairly sure I feel every one of my fifty three years and you are not a day over seventy six."

[prettyballsy]

"I just use my given name. No one uses it," he admitted, amused. "And no, I don't, he added quickly in case Harry had a memory moment, or a common sense moment, there. "Never thought of one." He supposed eventually he should.

"You got it. May change it in a couple of days. Pick up a burner than might give Merlin a few days of hacking or whatever he does to track down," he said, knowing he could never fully keep secerts from him, but might as well try.

He chuckled then. "If you meant twenty six, you're wrong. I'm exactly three days over, so there," he said, sounding so very childish. Not that he'd done much for his birthday with worrying about Harry. "And ain't nothing wrong with those fifty three years."

[fucking_gentleman]

"Your suit is bugged, your glasses have remote activation transmission and can pick up signals which are being transmitted within immediate vicinity. Even in your pocket, they can be used by someone with the command codes to intercept a mobile call and then the number it stored for later hacking."

He had no idea how he knew all that, but he did.

"I- sometimes I say the wrong words," he admitted, huffing with soft frustration. "... and Happy Birthday. I have a woeful lack of offerings to celebrate the event."

[prettyballsy]

"I know. I know all of that," he said, shrugging. "He knows I'm here. I know that. I can also buy time. I can set things to get a better chance. I'm not always wearing clothes and my glasses," he pointed out. "Did you really want me to say I would call you naked?"

Now he was being a dick, just because he could, and it was funny. At least to him.

"Nope, you didn't say the wrong thing at all. Say what y'want, Harry. I'm here to listen and talk." He made a face. "Naw. I didn't do anything for it. No big deal." He'd been too busy worrying about Harry.

[fucking_gentleman]

"Well, it might give an old man a bit of a cheap thrill," Harry retorted. "Assuming my heart can stand up to it."

Harry folded his hands in his lap. "I clearly did say what I did not intend to. It's a... quirk. One that I am eager to be rid of."

[prettyballsy]

"You're worth more than cheap anything," he said, not even thinking about the words before they were out. "But we'll save that until you're feeling better."

He was quiet a minute before saying softly. "You're going to say things as you remember them. You're being the man you are," he pointed out. "Even if you don't remember."

[fucking_gentleman]

Interesting. It seemed unlikely to him, but the young man's reactions were informative. They weren't lovers before, he was sure of that, but it was clearly not objectionable to Eggsy.

God only knew why he was interested, but he was.

Harry needed to know more about Harry Hart, the man code named Galahad.

"Even if I don't remember," he agreed. "My apologies, I intend on staying awake but being upright is starting to cause undue pain in my injuries."

He'd been shot in the head. He had also been exploded, stabbed several times and punched a lot. It was a lot to recover from.

[prettyballsy]

Eggsy was on his feet in a moment, coming over closer then. Concern furrowed his brow, shifting to stand over Harry where he could see the machines and their numbers.

"Then get some sleep, and I'll leave the number with the nurse," he offered. "I'll go back and stare blankly at Merlin while he rants at me, or worse, gives me the disappointed head shake. Ain't you giving me that look, so I'm not gonna feel guilt over it."

A pause, just staring down at the man. "One positive. Your head don't seem to be pounding and all. A start, right?" He smiled then, trying to focus on the positive. For both their sakes.

[fucking_gentleman]

"I don't need sleep. Just take the pressure off some old incisions."

He tilted the bed back to a 45 degree angle and watched the boy closely. He was emotionally invested. Incredibly emotionally invested. His former self must have been an idiot to be unaware of it, therefore he almost certainly was but had chosen to simply let it pass unmentioned.

"My head is, at present, attached and behaving within normal parameters."

[prettyballsy]

"Sorry. Took whatcha said wrong," he said, staying where he was. Eggsy wasn't entirely in the know of his own emotions. No, he knew them, but not how much they showed. It was all jokes and laughter and comments, right? Sure. That's what it was.

"I meant to tell you. I know you don't remember it maybe? From whatcha said but, I didn't mean to hurt you, Harry. I wouldn't do that if I had known."

And he had been fretting over that, terrified he had truly done more damage just in his need to not let Harry go again.

[fucking_gentleman]

Harry closed his eye briefly, making the conscious effort to relax his limbs and stomach.

Then he looked back to Eggsy. "Hurt me? What on earth are you talking about?"

[prettyballsy]

He shrugged, frowning at that question as he moved to fold his arms. "When... last time, you like had this look on your face and you just... I don't know. The memories hurt. What Merlin was sayin'. Why he didn't come back, because it hurt you."

And hurting Harry hurt him.

"Last time I saw you, we fought. I disappointed you. Don't want to hurt you."

[fucking_gentleman]

"You... disappointed me?" He couldn't really imagine how. It seemed rather unfathomable, actually. "My dear boy, you haven't hurt me. If last visit ended poorly, I am sorry for that but that is simply the nature of my injury. I would rather some discomfort than continuing to waste away in here wondering who and what I was that I had no one in the world to notice my absence."

[prettyballsy]

"Yeah I didn't shoot a dog and I stole a car," he said, rushing through the words as if that was nothing. His arms tightened in where he had them folded, shoulders hunching a bit. "And don't think that. Jesus fucking Christ don't think that. All I noticed since the day you were shot was you not there."

[fucking_gentleman]

"... well, not shooting a dog sounds reasonable. Unless JB had rabies."

He might have been derailed into wondering what JB was, but Eggsy firmly distracted him. Harry reached out, cupping Eggsy's face with his hand, briefly surprised at how large his hand looked against the boy. "My dear boy, I didn't mean to distress you."

[prettyballsy]

Dammit, dammit, dammit. He was doing okay. He was being a strong agent, a Kingsman. He wasn't even sure which one hit him that hard. Harry remembering JB, or that touch.

His eyes closed, so tight, painfully so, fighting the tears. "You didn't. You did your job. Don't worry though. The bastard that shot you paid for it." Not enough though. Not nearly fucking enough. "I did my job though, Harry. Promise. I did everything that you'd be proud. Every day."

[fucking_gentleman]

Bugger propriety.

Harry sat himself up, tugging the boy in against him. He desperately needed some contact, someone to hold him and promise that it was all right.

"I am proud, of everything I've heard and everything I've extrapolated. You are an exceptional young man and no one can take that away from you. Not even me."

[prettyballsy]

Oh! Oh that. He hesitated only a minute before he was wrapping his arms around Harry, trying to be gentle and cling at the same time.

"I let you down, and then I embarrassed you," he whispered. "I'm sorry." They were words in his head for months now, words he had whispered at night when he'd slowed down and had nothing to think about but Harry.

[fucking_gentleman]

Harry didn't try to stand, just pulled Eggsy down into his embrace and held him. The poor boy was a bit of a wreck under a neatly polished exterior and if Harry could in some fashion kick the butt of the man he was for contributing to that, he would.

"You're forgiven," he murmured softly. "You're all forgiven, Eggsy."