For prettyballsy

[fucking_gentleman]

The alarm was sounded at eleven in the morning, the day after Eggsy visited.

The alarms should have gone off before then, but Harry had hacked the machines, pulling and stripping wires and looping the feedback back into itself so there was no sign that he was no longer connected.

He had borrowed clothes by picking his way through the hospital, acquiring one item after another, cards and pass codes and by the time he left, he was dressed and had loose cash, a pilfered phone from a wanker who refused to turn it off and said wanker's credit card, which he used to withdraw the maximum he could and then tossed.

With more CCTV than any other city in the world, he then vanished off the grid.

By the time Eggsy was brought in by Merlin at quarter past midday, Merlin was waiting for another ping from a new internet cafe, the various footage of Harry's escape running behind him, being analysed by technicians for any hints.

"He realised he'd been made and vanished from the last internet cafe in under two minutes. He was off the cameras again within five. You're being authorised to locate and bring in Galahad, before he becomes a target or, worse, gives himself a stroke."

Comments

[fucking_gentleman]

It drew a weak snort of amusement from Harry. "I'm actually in a terrible amount of pain," he confessed in a soft whisper, close to Eggsy. "And it's steadily increasing to the point of nausea, but please don't move."

[prettyballsy]

"Bloody fucking hell, Harry." He snarled the words, soft though, his arm tightening a little bit around him. "Let me get them to get you a sedative, Harry. How long has it been hurting?"

Because if this is always and not just with these memories, he was going to have a fit. "Let me get someone to take care of you. I won't leave until you're asleep. Okay? I'll stay right here. Hold you." And try and not curse or cry.

[fucking_gentleman]

"No sedative." He didn't want a sedative. He would accept a pain killer or something anti nausea, but he didn't want to be unconscious again. He held on tightly, not letting Eggsy move away. "Lights down, no sound, but not a sedative."

[prettyballsy]

He didn't say anything for a long time, and then...

"Merlin? I need the lights down and the screen off. Can you have someone bring up something for nausea and pain. The tests were a bit much," he said, utterly Gawain and formal and knowing Merlin wasn't buying that reason.

[fucking_gentleman]

Eggsy's glasses went live, connection opening up. "Aye, I'll adjust it and a nurse is on the way with his medication. Try and get him lying down, last time this happened in the hospital, he had a seizure shortly after admitting to the pain."

[prettyballsy]

"Yes sir." No hesitation there. He had called on Merlin after all, he would act like a Kingsman. Not to mention because of what he had been told, he's been rethinking how he acted towards Merlin.

"Harry. Come on. Let me move JB and then I'm going to be right here with you. Okay?" He had an idea and would do what he needed to. Shifting, staying close but moving to pick up the dog so he could shift him carefully to the floor. He didn't want him jumping and hurting himself, dammit.

[fucking_gentleman]

Harry let him go with a bit of reluctance, but the lights went down and the screen off. Harry sighed slightly, watching as JB was lifted down to the floor again.

"You spoil him."

[prettyballsy]

Settling JB down, he chuckled. "Yep, I do. I gave up everything for him, I should spoil him for it," he said, but he moved up as far as he could, settling in at the head of Harry's bed. One butt cheek on the bed, leg curled and the other on the floor, bracing himself. It wasn't going to be comfortable. Not at all, but it would let Harry lay down and stay close.

"Lay back and rest your head here," he said, petting his chest. "I'll stay right here with you," he said, making that vow. "Lay back for me, Harry? I'll say please."

[fucking_gentleman]

Harry shifted to the side to give Eggsy more space to sit down on before using him as a pillow. He tugged him closer and then tucked himself in against the young man, head on his chest and eyes closing.

A nurse knocked and stepped in with a small cup of tablets and one of water. "Up, Galahad, swallow these and you can go back to sleep on Gawain."

He grumbled and pushed himself up right enough to do what he was told.

[prettyballsy]

Eggsy didn't take up much, leaving Harry as much room as he could. Chuckling at that tug, then another one when the door opened. Except it was nervous. He trusted Merlin's discretion, but he had to accept that eventually all of this would be talked about. He could only hope, for Harry's sake, they wrote it up to recovery.

Eggsy stayed still, only taking a moment to unbutton his jacket but not worrying about taking it off. Just offering himself to Harry so he could rest.

[fucking_gentleman]

Harry settled. He was pale again, but he didn't go into seizure, just slipped into something like sleep. It was fairly normal for a head injury patient to sleep a lot during recovery.

When the knock came fifteen minutes later, it wasn't a nurse. It was Merlin, slipping in quietly and coming over, touching Harry's temple softly before looking up to Eggsy.

[prettyballsy]

Eggsy stayed as still as he could, breathing shallowly. Waiting for a seizure that didn't come, scared that eventually the memories would actually cause damage that could take Harry from him.

Glancing up at the knock, he looked a bit surprised, and definitely nervous, that Merlin was there. "I apologize for not reporting like I should've," he said in a low whisper. "I'd planned on it but then..."

Then there had been memory and pain and he had let that go.

[fucking_gentleman]

"Don't." There was one thing they did actually agree on, which was that right now, Harry needed to come first, because he wouldn't look after himself give half the chance.

"Stupid bloody bastard would run himself into the ground given the choice." He glanced back at his friend. "He's on anti seizure medication as well. Should keep it under control."

[prettyballsy]

"It's my fault again," he said, not whining but owning up to his mistakes. "When he asked me about Arthur, I knew better," he admitted, shaking his head. "I'll hold my ground stronger," he offered, wanting to be responsible and worthy even in this.

"I'll do better to try and keep things calmer and limit how much we talk about the past," he said, already running over in his mind all he could have done differently.

[fucking_gentleman]

"You can't lie to him." That simple. "He'll know and then he'll badger. Just tell him, we'll deal with it. It's not like Harry Hart has ever done anything to easy way in his life."

They both knew Harry.

"You didn't do anything wrong, lad. If he wants to know, you might as well tell him." He looked at Eggsy. "This wasn't your fault."

[prettyballsy]

"There's ways of not telling him that ain't lying," he murmured, though he knew Merlin was right. "I should have just kept it to what he asked, nothing more."

And it was a vow he made to himself. Just what he had to, nothing more.

"I could've been pushing," he said, because it was what he was afraid of. "Even if I didn't mean to." He stared up at Merlin, serious and intense. "I got to watch that."

[fucking_gentleman]

"Eggsy. Stop. Listen."

Merlin came to sit on Harry's other side, in the curve of his knees and resting the clipboard on Harry's hip. "I made the call to leave Harry to recover int he hospital. I was wrong. Even if it causes him pain, he has a right to remember his life. He made that choice and we can't stop him learning. If he learns from us, we're here when it hits him. If we just give him a little, he'll hack into the system to find out for himself."

Harry's eye opened. "... 'm here," he protested.

"Yes, we know. Go back to sleep, Harry."

"You're not my mother," he mumbled.

"No, I'm not, your mother gave up trying to control your behaviour when you were eleven." He took one of Harry's hands and squeezed it.

Harry didn't reply, already asleep again.

[prettyballsy]

He did just as he was told, silent, intent on Merlin. He was still Eggsy, but he respected his life as a Kingsman as well. Even if he was good for smarting off about it as well.

Eggsy didn't even think, reaching out and stroking his hand along Harry's arm, reminding him he was there, holding him close. Not saying a word until he felt certain he was asleep again.

"And what if he's remembering things wrong," he asked in a soft whisper. He hadn't even meant to but then the words were there. "What if we're like messin' up his memories somehow?"

Or, as he wasn't saying. He. What if he was messing up Harry's memories, making him believe he felt something he hadn't before? He wasn't even sure that was possible, but it was a fear he had.

[fucking_gentleman]

Merlin was silent a moment, picking words. "If Harry is so attached to you that your suggestions can change how he remembers things, then I don't think you need to worry about taking advantage of this state. Make sense? Harry's been with Kingsman for over thirty years and he has never taken one of his nominations to his house.

"Until you."

Even Lee hadn't been invited to Harry's house.

[prettyballsy]

Eggsy stayed so quiet, just staring at Merlin. He wasn't entirely sure what to say, or even how to say it.

"I guess. I just..." He waved a hand, gesturing to where Harry was asleep against him. "I never saw this before. I couldn't have been that bloody blind, could I?"

Except the memories he held closest were of failing Harry, disappointing him, and then seeing him die. If there had been something else to see, he had blinded himself to it.

"And you don't got t'answer any of this." Because putting Merlin in that spotlight. "And I need to say I will never regret not listening when you said stay away from him, but I should have respected you and the Kingsman more."

[fucking_gentleman]

"No. But Harry is excellent at masking. It's what makes him an exceptional spy. No one sees anything unless he lets them."

Merlin had known Harry most of their adults lives and he still didn't always know what was going on in his head.

"I don't expect ye to regret it. I said. I was wrong."

"Mark the date on the calendar," Harry mumbled. "I wanna remember this."

"Go back to sleep, Hart. Or I'll donate your butterfly collection to the natural history museum."

[prettyballsy]

Eggsy wondered if that would mean Harry would regret things once he knew he'd let his guard down. Damn but he hated that idea.

"And he didn't want me to see this," he said, shrugging one shoulder with the slightly movement, not wanting to disrupt Harry. Even as he spoke.

"I'll get the tape for you," he murmured softly, stroking Harry's arm once more, trying to soothe him once more.

[fucking_gentleman]

Harry made a grumbling sound and curled up more, inadvertently hugging Merlin with his legs while settling his head more on Eggsy.

"No. Probably not. But you have and it's there now." He stood up again, running a hand over Harry's hip when he stirred. It might have seemed rather intimate, but they'd spent far too much time with each other to really care anymore.

"His reluctance probably has to do with your father's death. He never stopped blaming himself for Lee dying. Taking him away from your mother and you. And your hero worship of him... I would've had his balls if he'd tried it then."

[prettyballsy]

Eggsy watched Merlin, curious and not sure what all to think. He was physically uncomfortable and he would stay there as long as he had to, just to keep Harry close to him.

"He didn't do shit to take anything away from me," he said, knowing that it was likely that Merlin agreed, but that didn't mean Harry did.

"And what's changed now?" Because he needed to know if he was going to be dealing with Merlin if Harry continued to feel the same way even with his memories.

[fucking_gentleman]

"... Harry has frontal lobe damage in his brain. It might lessen, it might not, but his impulse control is limited right now. He thinks, he wants, he does. He also doesn't have the inhibitions that might stop him, like shame of embarrassment."

It wasn't affecting what he felt. Simply how he acted on those feelings.